i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
