we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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