just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
