Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
