New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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