How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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