I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize