that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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