I didn't shave. On purpose
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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