she woke up with a sticky ear
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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