So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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