oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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