I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
