Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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