well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Randomize
