I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
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