Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
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