Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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