Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize
