Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
