you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
