Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
