is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Randomize
