I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
