Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
