This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
