i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
The power of my boobs compel you
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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