I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
