capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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