Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Randomize
