I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
