singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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