I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
