I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You are the jesus of drinking
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
