you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
