From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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