butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
NoShamevember. You game?
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize