I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
