Is it because I queefed?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
She tied me up with her honor cords...
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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