i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
