You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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