please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Farmville is her only friend.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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