i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
