It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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