i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
