I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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