He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
