He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
