i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
