I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
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